What to Do When You Make Mistakes

Let’s face it. Nobody’s perfect. You have made mistakes before, and you will make more of them in the future. It happens. Most people shudder at the thought of making mistakes. They want to be seen as perfect and incapable of screwing up. But mistakes are valuable opportunities. When you make mistakes, you’ve found an opportunity for growth. You get to learn from it and do better next time.

You should embrace making mistakes for this reason. Learning is an important life skill. It’s one where you need to continually practice it to improve. But the rewards make it worth it. Learning helps you gain new knowledge and skills. It broadens your horizons and introduces you to new things. The information you learn gives you new thoughts to explore. And it opens you up to more possibilities in life.

What is a mistake?

A mistake is when you take an action or make a decision that you regret. Mistakes usually make you feel shame, guilt, embarrassment, or worthlessness. This bad feeling is a call to action. It’s a call from your best self.

Your mistakes teach you important lessons. You learn that you did something the wrong way. This could mean you did something generally considered wrong. Or you may have done something wrong for yourself. You gain new insight or knowledge that you can use next time. Think of mistakes this way: the more you make, the more you can learn.

The negative feeling of your mistake drives you to improve. You’ll feel an urge to take action. Correct the mistake. Make things right. And move on.

What happens when you make mistakes?

Nothing usually. Most mistakes won’t affect the rest of your life. They’ll pass you by like a ship in the night… If you allow them to. You need to let go of the perfect image you have of yourself in your mind.

You see, most people beat themselves up after making a mistake. But this is the wrong approach to fixing a mistake. Wallowing in self-pity only destroys you internally. It does no good for you to linger on the negative feelings that the mistake caused you to feel. You won’t lessen the consequence of your mistake. You’ll only make it worse for yourself.

The consequences of your mistakes are usually less severe than you think. Don’t worry about what’s going to happen because of your mistake. Worrying will only increase the pain the mistake causes you. There is nothing you can do about it until you learn exactly what the consequences are…

Each situation will have a different outcome after each mistake. Generally, the biggest consequence is the negative emotions that you feel.

Don’t panic after you make a mistake. You’ll only increase your suffering. Stay calm and poised. Be ready to move on from the mistake… After you learn from it.

When you make mistakes, how do you learn from them?

After making a mistake, there are 4 things you should do:

Own your mistakes

The first step to learning from your mistake is to own it. Take responsibility for what happened. Don’t push the blame onto someone or something else. This blame-shifting prevents you from learning. It’s a coping strategy that tries to maintain your perfect self-image.

Taking the responsibility for what happened requires courage on your part. But this courage is a sign of growth. It shows you that you’re able to accept the truth of the situation.

Make things right. If an apology is in order, then apologize. If you need to fix something, then fix it. And so on. Do what is necessary to correct the situation.

Analyze them

After you’ve owned your mistakes, it’s time to analyze them. This is where you ask yourself some tough questions to get to the bottom of the situation. Become a detective. Ask yourself these questions with a cold detachment. And answer them as honestly as you can.

Ask yourself: What happened? Why did it happen? Where did it go wrong? Was I completely at fault for it? How can I do better next time?

Think about your answers to these questions. Take this information and save it for later. Keep it in mind the next time a similar situation occurs.

Also, keep note of how you answered the questions. Were you honest? Did you try to pin the blame on someone or something else?

This step can take a while. It’s worth spending the effort to answer these questions to yourself. You’ll learn a lot about the situation where the mistake occurred. And you’ll also learn a lot about yourself.

Reframe the mistake

Accepting your mistake and analyzing it will teach you a lot of valuable lessons. But you won’t learn them unless you have the right mindset to accept these lessons.

You must reframe the mistake in your mind. Instead of being a “mistake”, it is a “learning opportunity”. It’s an instance that shows you where you can improve. Accept this opportunity to grow. This is known as having a “growth mindset.” You can learn something new that will help you the next time you face that situation.

Don’t let the negative feelings that the mistake initially caused to cloud over you. Take the learning opportunity as a blessing. You get to become better as a result of what happened. Reframing will remove the negative emotions you felt from making the mistake. You’ll now be able to view it in a healthy, perhaps even positive manner.

Try again

Now it’s time to take what you learned and put it into practice. You may find yourself back in the situation that caused the mistake. If this happens, use the information you learned from it the previous time. You can try things over and over again before you get it right. That’s ok. Improve a little bit each time. And do your best to avoid repeating the same mistake.

You can also apply what you learned to different situations. Many of the lessons you learn from your mistakes can transfer over to other situations.

For instance, let’s say you learned that research is important. You tried to start a business but it failed initially. You didn’t have enough knowledge to run a business efficiently, so you ran out of money. So you decide to try again. This time you start a business on a cost-effective budget, built on sound research. The business then grows into a success. You can also apply what you learned about the importance of research to another goal of yours. Let’s say you wanted to lose weight. So, you then research how to lose weight before you start, and you’re able to lose weight easily. And you avoid repeating the same mistake.

When you make mistakes, embrace them

Making mistakes is a part of life. We all make them. No one is perfect. You are not a failure for making a mistake. You are human.

The good thing about mistakes is that they provide a learning opportunity. It only takes a slight mindset shift to realize this. Instead of being fearful of mistakes, embrace them.

Screw up. Fall down. Get laughed at. Take risks. But don’t repeat your mistakes. Learn from them.

Don’t recklessly make mistakes just for the sake of making them. You should strive to do your best with everything you do. But don’t be afraid to make mistakes.

It’s all about how you respond to these mistakes that matters.

References:

https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/learn-from-mistakes.htm

https://www.theodysseyonline.com/its-okay-to-make-mistakes

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/shift-mind/201005/what-is-mistake