The Stoic Sage: How to Become Your Best Self
Photo by Simone Pellegrini on Unsplash
Do you have someone you look up to? A role model? Someone you aspire to be like?
If not, you might want to consider finding a role model.
We stand on the shoulders of giants. The people who come before us pave the way for us to move forward. They give us direction and inspiration.
They show us how to act. How to carry ourselves. How to interact with others. And how to live a good life.
They do most of the heavy lifting for us. We just have to follow their lead.
What is the Stoic sage?
Donald Robertson, Stoic author and cognitive-behavioral psychotherapist states that the Stoic sage is, “He lives in total harmony with himself, the rest of mankind, and nature as a whole because he follows reason and accepts his fate graciously, insofar as it is beyond his control. He has risen above irrational desires and emotions, to achieve peace of mind. His character is absolutely praiseworthy, honorable and beautiful”
The Stoic sage is the role model of the Stoics.
The sage is someone you choose for yourself. They are someone you look up to. They have character traits that you want to have.
Your Stoic sage is someone you should keep in mind and measure yourself against it.
Why measure yourself against your Stoic sage?
Measuring yourself against your Stoic sage gives you insight into how you are doing in your life. It tells you what you’re doing well at. But more importantly, it tells you where you are going wrong. Where you could be better.
This awareness of how you can do better is key to change. If you aren’t aware of where you could be better, then you won’t be able to change. Being aware of your shortcomings also allows you to choose the best possible response to solve them. You aren’t reacting mindlessly or emotionally.
Awareness puts you in control of the solution to your shortcomings.
As the Stoic philosopher Seneca states, “We need to set our affections on some good man and keep him constantly before our eyes, so that we may live as if he were watching us and do everything as if he saw what we were doing. This… is Epicurus’ advice, and in giving it he has given us a guardian and a moral tutor -and not without reason, either: misdeeds are greatly diminished if a witness is always standing near intending doers.”
How to measure yourself against them
To measure yourself against your Stoic sage, you need to ask yourself some basic questions.
In any situation, ask yourself:
What would my sage do?
How would my sage behave?
Answer these questions, and you’ll have a guide on how to act in each situation.
You can also ask yourself questions about how you acted after a situation occurs… Did you act like your sage would? What could you have done to act more like your sage? What could have been your best possible response to the situation?
Answering these questions honestly gives you great insight into your character. These questions help you figure out if you are living by these character traits you want. And they show you how you can do better.
If you don’t know how to give your best possible response to a situation, take a step back. Think to yourself, “How would my sage act?” Remember, your sage’s actions are guided by their character traits. Knowing these character traits helps you think about how you should act to live by these desired character traits.
Who is your sage?
You get to choose who your sage is.
Your sage is your role model. Study them. After all, they have the character traits you want to have in yourself. They are the person you want to learn from.
You can learn from them in a variety of ways. You can learn more about them by reading books, watching movies, listening to podcasts, etc.
Get to “know” them. Study how they behaved. Study their mindset. Their work ethic. Their goals. What made them tick. What they did for others. And so on…
Apply what you learn about them into your own life.
Put your best foot forward
Having your sage in mind at all times allows you to act with your best possible response. Keep them in mind, especially whenever a challenge arises or a frustrating event happens.
Put your best foot forward in each situation you find yourself in. Live with virtue. Be the best person you can be.
Remember, no one’s perfect. But you should always strive to be your best.
I wrote more about Stoicism in a previous blog. Check it out here to learn more.
References:
Salzgeber, J. (2019). The Little Book of Stoicism: Timeless wisdom to gain resilience, confidence, and calmness. Jonas Salzgeber.